Miss Grand Netherlands 2018 took a rocking start with twelve finalists. However, due to an unfortunate turn of events, one of the finalists, Deborah Van Hemert, had to back off. Now, only 11 finalists remain as the coronation night nears us.

The 11 finalists are enjoying every bit of the pageant and are working hard to get closer to the crown. The reigning queen Miss Grand Netherlands 2017, Kelly Van Den Dungen is also spending time with the delegates, giving them tips and sharing her own experience with the girls. The candidates of Miss Grand Netherlands 2018 also had a chance to enjoy an official photo shoot with the reigning queen.

But, it’s time we get to know each and every one of them personally. So here is Miss Grand Netherlands 2018 finalist Esmeralda Carelse’s future plans, and past struggles.

Q. How does it feel to be a delegate of Miss Grand Netherlands 2018?

I am completely new to the pageant world. When I was scouted, just before the casting, I couldn't imagine myself develop the way I did since. The jury of the election gave me a great opportunity and has not only given me a great self-confidence boost, but also helped me grow as a young woman. My drive in life has always been to help the people around me. As a little girl I would always give the money I got for my birthday to the people who needed it more than me. I was raised with the important value to always help others, and for this reason I continue to do a lot of volunteer work for different organizations.

Q. What is the best lesson you've learnt that has shaped your life?

Living in a time where we are pressured to live the perfect life, can lead to a lot of insecurities. We are very focused on our online presence and we take everything we see on social media as a reality, which can cause self doubt. This was one of the reasons I had a burn-out in 2015. It was a very challenging time for me. I had to rediscover myself and what I find important as a person. Now, after this period, I am able to look at life in a different light, and I taught myself to be happy with who I am and to not judge others: knowing that everyone goes through their own difficulties.

Q. What is the one thing that keeps you going and inspires you to be the best version of yourself?

I find my peace in writing down my thoughts and feelings. I have a diary which I would recommend to everyone. The trick I use is to write to myself as if I am writing to one of my closest friends. Doing this gives me a lot of new insights about life but mostly myself. Sometimes I go back in time in my diary to see how I developed as a person. This gives me motivation to always continue to write.

Q. Other than the Miss Grand Netherlands crown, what do you want to achieve from this competition?

Being scouted gave me this amazing opportunity to take myself seriously. I saw myself grow in such a short time and it is absolutely amazing. I feel blessed to be able to experience this. Since the competition, my self-confidence has grown and I became more comfortable in connecting with the people around me. With the feedback I challenge myself to step outside my comfort zone and to be more critical. This also helped me grow which has been the best part of the journey so far.

Q. We're sure that this competition is just another milestone in your life. What is that one thing that you consider your life goal?

Currently I am studying Online Media. I find it very interesting how you can easily reach the world through the internet. What I want to achieve is creating an online platform aimed at all young women worldwide. In many countries women cannot go to school due to certain social issues. I find this very sad. Everyone should have the chance to get a proper education to gain knowledge of the world. With my online platform, I want to teach young women how to be independent by teaching them different things and giving them tools for building and developing  their own start-up. In addition I want to be able to offer space for self-development and I want to make sexual education a topic for discussion. If I can inspire women to be independent and happy, then I have achieved my life goal.

Q. How would you like to represent yourself at the national stage at Miss Grand Netherlands 2018?

My personal goal is not to show how I want to represent myself, but who I have become. The jury saw me for the first time a few weeks ago and I would love for them to see my growth within this short time. I showed up at the casting with no make-up, had no clue what to expect, borrowed my roommate’s bikini, got uncomfortably nervous because everyone was so beautiful and elegant. I always feel comfortable being a laid-back girl with no make-up, wearing t-shirt, jeans and sneakers. But now that I am in this election I am pushed to explore my feminine side and to embrace it. To be honest, I love it and I feel empowered by it. I hope that I can inspire others as well to challenge themselves and to love themselves because we only have one life to be the best versions of ourselves.

Q. Who is your idol, and what values of theirs do you wish you could inculcate in your own life, and teach the next generation?

There is not a specific person who inspires me. It is the combination of statements, thoughts and performances of different people who can inspire me. Whether you are a belly dancer or a nobel prize winning scientist, what is important is that you are fully enjoying whatever it is that you're doing. But what I find most important in life is to motivate the next generations to love. Love for yourself, love the earth and love others.

Q. If you could be invisible for a day, how would you like to spend it?

Travel 24/7.

Q. Would you like to share your most special childhood memory with us?

Growing up in the beautiful city of Amsterdam, there wasn't a lot of nature surrounding me. The closest I got to a chicken was in a supermarket. After school I would always spend my time with friends on the playground and we would all be home for diner by 6 o'clock. A safe and structured life, you can say. Once every two years we went to my family in a small village in Indonesia for two months. This was quiet different from my life in Amsterdam. Indonesia is a beautiful country with breathtaking jungles, rivers and mountains. I would climb trees, hunt in the jungle with my uncles and buy chickens on the market to resell them or slaughter them myself. I had no idea that a pineapple grew out of a plant. I got to know nature there. I was not aware of it at the time, but now that I am older I realize how special it is and how grateful I am to grow up in two completely different worlds.

Q. What is the one thing you can label as your guilty pleasure?

Pizza! next question.

Q. If you are granted 3 wishes right now, what would you ask for?

To be able to travel all over the world and meet people from different cultures. Respect for one another, whatever the persons religion, race, sexual preference or gender may be. And I would love to have my own farm.

Q. Lastly, is there any message that you would like to give to your fans at Angelopedia?

It is a cliché, but clichés are there for a reason. Find yourself beautiful and love yourself. Do what makes you happy.

As soon as you believe in yourself, your environment will also believe in you.